From the desk of Thor Odinson
by Spotted Dreams
Summary: First of all I would like to thank everyone for their attendance at this decade's family reunion, the total number of participants reaching 415, just barely breaking the previous record of 406. Many kudos should be given to the castle staff for successfully accommodating all of our guests with the upmost quality of service despite all the incidents which occurred...


From the desk of Thor Odinson to all attendants of the most recent Royal Aesir Family Reunion,

First of all I would like to thank everyone for their attendance at this decade's family reunion, the total number of participants reaching 415, just barely breaking the previous record of 406. Many kudos should be given to the castle staff for successfully accommodating all of our guests with the utmost quality of service despite all the incidents which occurred. This brings me to the main reason for writing this letter for although no one was harmed during the event the house of Odin must express its disappointment with the behavior of many of our guests.

First of all, the notices that Loki's Jotun relatives would be attending was NOT in any way, shape, or form an invitation to bring lethal weapons and attempt to kill our new found family. I would also like to personally condemn those individuals who saw fit to leave obscene graffiti on my brother's door, he is still very distraught by it and it cost us a great deal to have it repainted.

Second of all, to whoever is responsible for turning Fandral into a rat although your sense of humor is appreciated we must forbid any further actions of identical or similar nature. It took both my brother AND my mother over thirteen hours to locate him within the palace walls and return his to his original form.

Next, I would like to apologize for my own ill behavior upon the arrival of one Malekith the Accursed, I was unaware Loki had invited him and my attempts to force him into a straight jacket was probably the worst course of action I could have pursued. As it turns out Malekith is half frost giant (which is also the reasoning behind his unique appearance) and Loki's father is the third cousin twice removed to Issvard of house Galaxy, the great Grandmother to Malekith. On a side note, if anyone knows the location of the key to Malekith's mouth guard, or better yet is in position of the object itself, please send it to us with all possible expedience. Sif has already broken three daggers in effort to remove it and his is undoubtedly plotting many a terrible things against me.

Finally, I would like to invite everyone back in ten years for the next family reunion. The details of the location and time will be sent to you vial dimensional scroll mail within a year of its soon to be planned date. We would like to notify that Loki's Jotun relatives will once again be joining us. We are also permitting Malekith to return along with his father, twelve uncles, and all of their immediate family. We are also going to be enforcing a new policy that any and all items that can legally be classed as weapons, magical or otherwise, will be confiscated upon arrival. The same goes for all magical artifacts regardless of whether or not they can be classified as weapons, the only exceptions be those items that must be carried at all times for medicinal use, whether it be a constant need or case of emergency. I must also make it very clear that any and all violence will not be tolerated, even if directed at the frost giant and dark elf section of our family.

Lots of love, Thor Odinson

P.S. Please disregard the note about the key to Malekith's mouth guard, turns out it was in my tunic pocket the entire time. Malekith has since been safely returned to his own realm after chasing me around the castle and making several threats to castrate me should I ever try that again.

P.P.S. Loki if you're reading this I'm currently hiding in the little elevator the servants use to sent food to my room. If could help me get out that would be great as I cannot for the life of me untangle the rope.


End file.
